The feelings are real

The one thing that I relish most about being sober is feeling again. I used alcohol as a way to do the exact opposite, to feel nothing. My anxieties went away, problems seemed to fade, but also, happiness and joy wasn’t real. Without alcohol in my life, the struggles of everyday life don’t go away,…

Grasp

Your grasp on me was strong, it had tightened over the years, How hard I tried to free myself Your hold was inescapable But now I’m free and free I’ll stay

Keys to the Castle

So there I sit, the room is starting to fill up…  I look at the clock… it’s 6:30, the time has come. The gavel bangs the table… ‘Welcome to the 6:30 grapevine meeting, my name is Matt and I’m an alcoholic’ I’m chairperson for the first time. Im nervous, but excited. I know the routine,…

LOL… not funny

This morning, I stopped at the local gas station to grab my morning coffee…  As I walked past this display, this sign caught my eye…  for obvious reasons. That word, the word that has been in my vocabulary so often for the last few years.  The word that has tried to define me, the word…

Move your feet…

Another great meeting last night, another opportunity to listen, reflect and hear stories of hope and peace. There always seems that there is (at least) one simple statement that really ring true, and last night was no exception… A gentleman was saying that on earth thing he is working on is not letting his mind…

Enjoy the Journey

It’s a bit cliché, and heard often.  There are many variations of the premise.  Maybe it was Aerosmith that said it best: ‘Life’s a journey, not a destination’ The meaning behind all of these cliché phrases, are to not just enjoy the end, but enjoy the journey. How true this has been in recovery! For…

When Simplicity in Sobriety is Not So Simple..

One thing I’ve been focusing on in recovery and part of the inspiration for the name of this blog, is to keep things simple. However, I’ve been noticing this simple mindset is anything but. It’s a result of the insanity of this disease and the selfishness that’s driven me so deep, but I’ve always been…

Experiencing Grief – from the loss of drinking?

So, the past few days have been tough, and I’m not really sure why…  I just don’t feel that ‘spark’ that I used to have, I feel disconnected, short tempered, just not excited.  It kind of feels like depression, I think.  But I don’t feel like it’s a strong urge to drink that is driving…

Simple Serenity

Nobody’s life is absent of struggles, stress and a fair amount of uncertainty. If someone tells you otherwise, they are lying. That’s life, there are ups and downs, good days and bad, sunshine and rain. But, I will tell you this…  as I continue down a road of recovery, I am truly amazed at how…

Forward

One step gives way to the next Always forward, never back While I may slow, I’ll never fall Always further than what I was Closer to where I want to be

Rising Above the Stigma

A friend recently shared an article on Social Media about the challenges a physician experienced in dealing with depression, self-care and recovery.  You can read the Article Here.  While I could not relate to the experience of a physician’s experience, but overall it really hit home.  I feel like the points that were brought up…

An Issue of Body or Mind…

I’ve always been an overthinker, So, when I first entered sobriety, I dug in and started reading anything and everything I could get my hands on, related to addiction, misuse, overconsumption.  Possibly looking for loopholes, but also looking for hope, a light at the end of the tunnel. One thing that continues to perplex me,…